The Surprise of Life

I was going to write something completely different tonight. As a matter of fact I had actually written it in my head on the way to the gym.

I am getting things together. All those small projects that just seem to kick around and you never get to them.

So tonight I am organizing my pictures. Yes, that's right I am not digital yet. I did buy a digital camera last week. It's still in the box. Another project.

So I was putting together the photos from my trip to Ireland with my parents in the summer of 2005. I like to think of that period as the beginning of my unravelling. The trip was amazing. I had such a fantastic time. Sure there were moments of work, but overall it was one of my best vacations ever. Ireland is absolutely stunning. The people we met were outstanding. All the factors just worked. I love when that happens in life.

I would never have predicted the eventual fall out I would have with my family. I would never have predicted watching myself completely fall apart. I would never have predicted that I would continue to work on my family relationships again. But that all happened.

Looking at the pictures reminded me of two amazing weeks I had with my parents. As an adult. Most people will never have the experience of travelling through Ireland with their parents when they were 40. I am so grateful to have had that experience.

I finally get that I don't accept my parents as they are. I get that they don't accept who I am. But somehow we all keep trying. I plan to be gentler this time. Go a little slower.